212. School Series: Benefits of Homeschooling with Jodi Mockabee

Sep 18

Deuteronomy‬ ‭6:5-7‬ ‭(NIV) “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”

‭‭**Transcription Below**

Questions and Topics We Cover:

How did your grandfather teach you about “kingdom economy”?
How have you set up your life in such a way that your entire family pursues wholeness?
Do you have any other practical tips for parenting or homeschooling you'd like to share?

Jodi Mockabee is a photographer, writer, blogger, speaker, social media influencer, and homeschooling mother of five living in the Black Hills of South Dakota. With a passion for health, wellness, parenting, and more, Jodi blogs her family's journey and shares tips for a healthy and active lifestyle. She also writes curriculum for creative and artistic learning in a homeschool environment. Find her at JodiMockabee.com.

Jodi's Book: The Whole & Healthy Family

Follow Jodi on Instagram

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Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)

Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”

Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”

Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”

Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”

Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”

Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”

Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of his glory.”

Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”

Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“

Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“

Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

‭‭**Transcription**

[00:00:00] <music>

Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.

[00:00:18] <music>

Laura Dugger: Leman Property Management Company has the apartment you will be able to call home, with over 1,700 apartment units available in Central Illinois. Visit them today at Lemanproperties.com or connect with them on Facebook.

We get to continue our school series today, and this time we are hearing from my guest, Jodi Mockabee. Jodi is the homeschooling mom of five children and author of The Whole and Healthy Family: Helping Your Kids Thrive in Mind, Body, and Spirit. And we're going to talk about each of those areas, so I can't wait to share her insight into homeschooling and parenting. Here's our chat.

Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, Jodi.

Jodi Mockabee: Thanks so much for having me, Laura. I'm happy to be here.

Laura Dugger: Well, will you just launch our conversation by sharing your personal testimony? [00:01:19]

Jodi Mockabee: Sure. I grew up in a Christian home. My dad was a pastor, his dad was a pastor. I don't really know when the moment that I knew that God was true and real. It was just a part of my identity from the beginning being raised in that kind of covenant household.

But I do remember from a young age, probably around the age of five, truly experiencing a relationship with God on my own, feeling independent from my family and my parents' beliefs, feeling the Lord move within my heart, stir within my heart.

I have some really vivid memories of worship in our own church and the Lord just moving my heart from a young age, before you have that critical eye that you look through, so you know that it's real and true. I just remember encounters with God very young, and that is when I definitely devoted my life to Him. [00:02:19]

I grew up in a healthy family, spiritually and mentally. My dad got diagnosed with brain cancer when I was 10. That kind of threw our whole family for a loop and was a really difficult time for our family.

I don't think I've ever shared this on a podcast, but it is part of my testimony. When he found out that he had brain cancer, the tumor was the size of a grapefruit. They didn't think he would make it through. And this is back in 1990. The medical treatment wasn't where it is today either.

But he fell to his knees. He was diagnosed on Valentine's Day, so February 14, 1990. He fell to his knees and he just said, "Lord, please give me just 10 more years so I can see my children grow up, so that I can be a dad in their life." And he died 10 years to that day.

If that doesn't tell you that there is a loving God who listens to our prayers, then I don't know what does. [00:03:23] He died on Valentine's Day, 2000. We did get 10 years extra with him. Coming so close to death from his perspective, he poured so much into what was important, which was his family. We just got 10 years of an incredible father and mentor, watching him be an amazing husband.

I look back and that was probably my most formative years of just having this incredible mentor in our household. He passed away when I was in college. I met my husband shortly after that.

My husband and I were not really following the Lord closely when we both met. That's another testimony to God's goodness, because it could have gone really bad. Just because we were both in such a bad place, we were not seeking the Lord.

The fact that God is sovereign and knew all along that we were to be each other's helpmates, it still blows my mind that we're still married based on who we were when we met. [00:04:30] That's kind of our testimony.

As the years have progressed and we've added children and our life has gotten messier, all I can say is that the Lord is faithful and good. We've been through some really hard things. The Lord is just so faithful and has managed to just allow us to laugh through a lot of it. I'm just grateful to be here.

There's so much to be grateful for. I feel like in general, my testimony is just a testimony of gratefulness of God's goodness.

Laura Dugger: Wow. Jodi, thank you so much for sharing that. I was already struck with tears in my eyes within those first few minutes. I am so sorry for the loss of your father. That's never easy, regardless of the age.

Jodi Mockabee: No, no, it's not. I think from an early age, I just learned that nothing's wasted. One of my favorite verses, even before he had died, I believe it's 2 Corinthians 1:1-3. [00:05:31] It talks about the God of comfort and how God comforts us so that we can comfort others. I didn't know how substantial that verse would be in my life until we've encountered really difficult things. To me, just nothing is a true loss because He uses it to comfort others in the kingdom.

There are so many topics that are really awkward for us to handle as believers, you know, on how do you say or how do you respond to things? But I just think nothing's fully lost. It's all to gain in one way or another. So, yes, it was horrible, sad. It's still really sad to know that my dad never knew my kids and my kids never knew my dad. But it's all for God's glory in one way or another. Thank you. That's a really long response.

Laura Dugger: No.

Jodi Mockabee: I'm so sorry.

Laura Dugger: No, this is wonderful. [00:06:30] Really, we're just getting a glimpse into the rich spiritual heritage that you had even these men in your life. Going back to your grandfather, even, there's a story that you share in your book. Can you tell us what he taught you about kingdom economy?

Jodi Mockabee: Yes, absolutely. My grandparents were really wonderful, powerful people for the Lord's kingdom. Probably the most selfless people that you would ever know.

They fostered hundreds of kids, adopted kids, just heavily active in the kingdom. They never lived extravagantly. The idea of the quote-unquote American dream just disgusted my grandpa, the white picket fence and the big house and the two kids and all that. That's his opinion.

But they lived a true life with that. They lived very modestly. They had a small income but gave away everything. [00:07:30] There were many situations where they tried to give to us or did give to us, and we were just so humbled by it, knowing that they made less money than we did.

I share a story in the book about how twice throughout my grandfather's life, the IRS had to audit him because the numbers didn't make sense when he put in his taxes. And it always showed that they gave away more than they made. So it was an instant red flag for the IRS. And so twice people had to come to their home to go through, and this was when everything was on paper, so to go through kind of their records and things like that.

And my grandpa, he's a German engineer, very just methodical, kept great accounts of everything. So it's comical that he got audited because he's so careful, very black and white. There's no manipulating the system on his end. [00:08:30]

And so twice he got audited, twice the people that were sent to do his auditing went through all of the files and recognized that they did, in fact, give more than they made. And both times these people left saved. My grandparents, just by living their lifestyle, were able to add to God's kingdom, just by showing that it is possible to give more than receive.

That is a part of my spiritual heritage. They will always be a great inspiration for what it's like to be stewards, what it's like to give. That story is just a fun one to share because it seems pretty impossible.

Laura Dugger: Yes. And the people walked away with their lives changed knowing Jesus. It's so incredible.

Jodi Mockabee: And the phrase "kingdom economy", I think that has helped teach us that... just like our children, our children are not ours. They're here for us to steward for a short amount of time. [00:09:33] But that's the same with money. Nothing you make or spend is yours. It's the Lord's money and it all serves a purpose.

So the kingdom economy, that phrase that they always used was like picturing just this money exchanging hands all for God's glory. You may give, but you'll also be provided for. And they lived so truly to that. They sold their home when they were no longer able to care for it. So they were in their late 80s, maybe early 90s, And they didn't have a retirement or anything like that. Very modest income and were very careful with their money.

So when they sold their home, they came up with a plan to live on my cousin's property. Everyone that they had blessed in their lifetime came together and built this in-law quarters on my cousin's property. And just watching all these tradesmen work together, doing it from the goodness of their heart, not charging, you know, all the materials, just this whole community kind of pulled together to build this house for these people. [00:10:42]

And it wasn't like there was some traumatic event that brought them all together. It's just pulling from years of experience of being a part of kingdom economy.

We tend to fear so much about being provided for, but it's kingdom economy. It all kind of works and floats around. It's got its own currency in a sense that the Lord uses. So that's where that phrase kind of came from.

Laura Dugger: In our series so far, it's been fun to hear the best parts of every schooling option. Now I'm eager to also get to hear your perspective as a homeschooling mother of five. But going back, is that always what you and your husband plan to do for education?

Jodi Mockabee: Absolutely not. We raised our children in the area that I grew up in. I went to a private Christian school, small little Christian school. I had planned on sending my children there. In fact, they started in that school. [00:11:42] Two of my children started in that school. And all of the friends that I had grown up with our community, they all sent their kids to this school. So there was just this beautiful community-based relational experience raising our kids together in this school.

When the Lord started prompting, when He started kind of challenging us, that threw me for a loop. It was like, wait, what? But you know that I'm selfish Lord. You know, that I like my own time. I like my house clean. And it's not like we were coming from a bad situation where we were fleeing and needed to homeschool. We had a great situation going on.

So just kind of felt out of left field, to be honest, when we originally felt that stirring. But we dove into the word, we prayed, we sought the Lord, like, "Is this really what you want us to do? And He was so clear through scripture and through just us seeking out counsel from mentors and elders that it was what our family was supposed to do. [00:12:50] So it was not on my radar. I didn't know anything about it before the Lord truly just prompted us to do so.

Laura Dugger: And of the schooling options, I would say that homeschooling provides the most unique schedule. Will you help us understand what type of rhythms or schedule you maintain most weeks?

Jodi Mockabee: Yeah. So probably the first, I want to say two to three months when we started our journey, and I think we're going into our 11th year of homeschooling, the first couple of months, I really thought that I was headed into a certain direction or a philosophy on homeschooling. Since it was spirit-led from the beginning, I was relying on the Lord 100% to help guide us in our homeschooling journey. Because I really didn't know what we were doing. And thank the Lord He did.

I remember Him prompting me... I was watching my kids and I was thinking, There's not this like fire in them. They're not excited about this. What do I do? [00:13:51] What do I change in order to make them excited?

And I remember him kind of prompting me like watch for the light in their eyes when they do get excited. So I did. I started paying attention to what they were doing. And what I learned was when I read aloud to them and we discussed the books, they just became alive. I mean, the spark, the twinkle was there, there was so much discussion. Even my two-year-old twins were into it. There was just a lot of unity when we would read aloud together.

So He helped me kind of throw the curriculum out the window and everything that I had relied on in the first few months to make sure that I was doing things quote-unquote, "right". He kind of said, "Ditch it and follow what lights them up."

That's when I discovered Charlotte Mason, which is literature-based education. You're basically essentially using books to teach your children all the different subjects. [00:14:52] And it's just a very holistic form of schooling.

So our schedule after those first few months changed to accommodate that type of schooling. So I would say that we are a pretty routine-based family in a lot of things that we do. It seemed kind of natural just to keep that routine going.

First thing in the morning, we would always get up and run and we continued to do that and continue to do it now. And then after the kids would run, they would do a little bit of independent work, anything that they didn't necessarily need me for. So that would be, you know, math. And if they were readers, they would read on their own for 45 minutes. They would do their own personal Bible devotional.

Those were all done before breakfast was even made. And we called those our daily disciplines. Those were just daily disciplines that you do on your own and you're responsible on your own to get them done. [00:15:52] Then we would have breakfast. Everyone would kind of make breakfast together.

After our breakfast, we would do what I call morning collective. And that is where we gather together and I read for anywhere from about an hour and a half to three hours. Typically it's anywhere from four or five books to seven books that I read excerpts from.

And it starts with the Bible and it ends with whatever I had chosen for that day to end. But all of the different books cover some sort of different subject, you know. So there might be a book on Blaze Pascal. And that kind of covers the history of science and math. We might read a book on morals. So we just had all, all these different books that we would go through.

What I found too is after morning collective, they would be so inspired by one or two of the books that they would go outside and reenact and recreate what we had just read. [00:17:00] And it opened up all of this kind of organic form of play where they're whittling knives and making necklaces and pretending that they're in the Wild West or whatever it was, whatever book we were reading, they were so inspired by that, that they would kind of recreate it.

Then after a few hours of them playing outside, they'd come back in and we would notebook. That's kind of a process that we created on our own. Notebooking has been out there for a long time, but we really zeroed in on a specific technique of notebook.

That is where they narrate back a choice on their end, unless I assign it of a book that we had read that day. And so they narrate back and then they write about it. And they also illustrate. So we have binders and binders filled with these beautiful illustrations, narrations that are water colored.

I'm just so grateful for the Lord. [00:18:01] I would have never imagined any of that happening, but it truly has created just the most beautiful educational experience in our household. That was 10 years ago that we started that and we're still doing it today.

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Laura Dugger: If this is a new concept for someone and they're wondering, well, how much time then are you spending preparing for the next day or where did you find all of these books to cover all the subjects, how would you respond to some of those practical questions?

Jodi Mockabee: I actually wrote manuals. I wrote A Getting Started manual that covers our personal homeschool philosophy. It is truly a combination of Charlotte Mason, Waldorf, Montessori, classical. I've taken kind of the best of all of those and put them together to suit our family's needs.

And then having five kids, we live pretty simply. So that just kind of translated into our schooling experience too. Everything's about efficiency for me. So it was kind of how do we make it the most beautiful and the most efficient? [00:21:02]

And I learned that through education, you can simplify so much. There's so much extra busy work in public school, Christian school, homeschool even that is not enriching our children at all. It's just keeping them busy so that we feel like they're learning, but it's just busy work.

This is why grammar drives me bananas. At any school they start grammar, maybe second grade, you know, where you learn noun, pronoun, all of that stuff. They are still teaching it in college. And the reason why is because the kids forget every single year.

Well, why do you think they forget? Because there is zero interest. I don't know anyone who has ever fallen in love with the parts of speech.

But somehow we can put together sentences. Somehow we can write emails yet. They're reteaching this subject over and over and over. [00:22:03] And it's because we can't retain it because we're not interested in it.

So I just think if you can find where your kids get lit up, focus on that. Of course, they still need to read and write and do math, but you really want to focus on the things that bring light and life into your household, because that's what they're going to retain and hold on to.

If somebody's looking for help, I do have a website, Jodimockabee.com that has the getting started manual, and it also has the notebooking manual, and it will walk you through schedules and answer to simplifying your homeschool. So that's out there. I'm not trying to sell anything. But if people are interested in finding out kind of how we simplified our schooling and made it beautiful and somehow managed to learn through all of that, then you can kind of check that out.

Laura Dugger: We will put links in the show notes for today's episode so it makes it easy to access your website. [00:23:01] Jodi, you're such an intentional woman. So can you share more ways that you have set up your life in such a way that your entire family pursues wholeness?

Jodi Mockabee: First I probably should give a little disclaimer that I don't think it's ever natural for any member of our family to pursue wholeness. I think our sinful tendencies will always drive us to make more selfish decisions.

I wouldn't say currently that any of my kids naturally are pursuing wholeness. At this moment, you know, I have a 17-year-old, 15-year-old, 13-year-old, and two 11-year-olds. And out of the five, only two diligently choose to wake up and run or work out. The other three, I still have to say, "Let's do our daily discipline."

So that kind of just gives you an idea that we haven't raised this unicorn family, that they're all disciplined and pursuing wholeness on their own. [00:24:09] It's really about habits and discipline.

Probably it goes back to my heritage. When we were talking about my grandparents, my grandpa ran every day until he 24 hours before he died. So he was a disciplined person and just showed that just methodical little tiny habits throughout the day add up to something.

And so with homeschooling, I would say that's the same thing. You do not need a grand plan with all these boxes to check and everything. But if you can hold on to certain disciplines, you'll just see how they add on to each other.

I think that's kind of how the holistic approach in our family unraveled was noticing that everything's kind of interconnected. So if I can get my family to exercise daily, the attitudes, the countenance of my children is so much happier, so much higher in our household. [00:25:10]

And then you start noticing, well, if they have eggs for breakfast instead of cereal, they're more grounded. That protein just kind of is exactly what their body needs versus the sugar. So you start making tiny little changes and tweaks to start recognizing how every little decision impacts your family.

I think ultimately the end goal is peace. Having five children, five under five, it was noisy. There's a lot of needs. I have a son that's on the spectrum. So there was extra needs on his end. So there's always just people tugging for affection and need and help and all of it.

For me, it was trying to grasp some way to find a peace within our family. So I just started recognizing everything so interconnected, our bodies, our spirits, our minds. And so if we can somehow tweak things to where we're thriving in one or the other, you start noticing where you're not thriving and you want to work on that too. [00:26:17] That's kind of where this whole and healthy family philosophy came from.

Laura Dugger: Yes. I love in your book how you do break down focusing on mind, body, spirit, and then like you said, how they're interconnected and ways that exercise and fitness go hand in hand with moral training. Anything else you would like to add there?

Jodi Mockabee: I don't think so. I think it could be really overwhelming to just see the big picture and think like, where do I start there? And to the mom that kind of knows that maybe there needs to be some changes in our household or something, just start with one habit.

My favorite response from the book is hearing families that the one thing they took from it was the fitness aspect. And they started running together in the morning or going on a walk together in the morning and it changed their entire day. And it does. That's what exercise does. And it doesn't have to be at the gym or a run. I mean, it could be hard work. [00:27:20] It could be working on the garden. It could be putting up a fence together or something. It's just getting those endorphins going, but it really does change your day.

If you can see the effect of a good decision of a new habit being made like that, the rest will unravel itself. So to the mom that's feeling a little bit overwhelmed, just start with one habit and you'll see how much more that gives you. And then you'll want to start on another one.

Laura Dugger: We've had some fantastic guests in this series who have represented the best parts of public school and private education. So now with your experience, what are some of the wonderful aspects of your lifestyle that are specifically available because you're home-educating your children?

Jodi Mockabee: You know, the answer to that will be different every single year. I'll give you my current answer. The early years, the answer would have been it really simplified. [00:28:21] It taught us how to slow down. It taught us how to savor. It built a bond in my children that you just cannot build with limited time together.

We were together all day, every day exploring things together and learning things together. So during that time, I would say it built this just beautiful foundation of learning together and growing together.

Then I would say right now in this stage that we're at, I've got two high schoolers, one junior higher into an elementary school. I am able to cater to each one of them in such different ways. The early years, we all kind of focused in together on this philosophy and notebook together and did everything together. Now I'm able to see their gifts and their strengths and their weaknesses and build an academic plan based on what they need or what they're good at. [00:29:21]

My oldest son is very academic. He has been taking college classes for three years. He's a senior this fall and we've been able to just kind of push him academically. He has attended three different colleges. And so if you're in kind of a public school system or even a private school system, you're all about the next step and kind of sticking to that and not quitting.

Well, homeschoolers are like, no, you do what works for you, what lights the fire, and then when it no longer works, you can switch tactics. And so he's truly an example of that. He started at an engineering school. We did some classes there that really worked with him, but then the trajectory was going to be too intense for a 14-year-old. So then we brought him over to a Christian classical college and he was able to learn rhetoric and some of these subjects that really required higher levels of thinking. [00:30:21] That really stretched him there.

And then we decided let's bring him back to the engineering school. He took some more classes there. And so now this semester, he has decided he wants to learn business and so now he'll be attending a different school where he'll be taking business classes.

So we have been able to just follow his needs and cater his education accordingly. I love that. I love that he's getting exposure to engineering and STEM, but then also rhetoric and classical education. And now he'll get to learn accounting and marketing strategies. I just think there is no one-size-fits-all-all. And so where homeschooling comes in is you are able to really cater to each of your children's gifts.

My second son loves working. Since the age of 10, he has had a job. He loves working. He works at a cattle ranch. He knows the ins and outs of everything from shoveling cow poop to artificially inseminating their best cows, you know, sells the bowls. [00:31:28] He's a part of all of it.

He's able to do that. He's working two, three days a week. And we cater his school towards that by adding extra academics in the other two days but really just being strategic about making sure that he's getting those needs met without being overloaded so that he can work, which is what he loves to do.

So it just shows you that as you grow in homeschooling, you're able to kind of outsource a bunch of things to cater exactly to that child.

Laura Dugger: It sounds like the opportunities are endless in homeschooling, but I also think that we typically hear the most fear arising in people who are parents who are about to try homeschooling for the first time. I think there's more fear there than sending your children to public or private school. I'm sure you get so many of these myths that your children aren't going to be socialized or how are they going to perform academically? [00:32:26]

Are there any other myths that you've heard or encouragement you could give to the parents who are about to begin homeschooling for their first time?

Jodi Mockabee: Absolutely. I mean, the Bible says it best. We're the ones to be teaching in the day, all throughout the day. Also, all you need to do is look at history and see that the majority of people have been home-educated.

Public education is a new concept. It's only 150 years old. But you look back thousands of years and children were taught within their homes. I would say, lean into that, know that you're equipped. Kids are remarkable human beings. We are remarkable human beings. We are so capable of learning.

I never respond well to fluffy encouragement, but I want facts and information. I want to hear studies and numbers and all of that. [00:33:23] So a story will probably speak much better than just me encouraging a mama or a dad who's listening.

I have a friend born and raised together. She decided to homeschool shortly after we did, you know, 10 years ago, and decided right away that she wanted to take this unschooling path with her daughter. For those who don't know what unschooling is, it's basically being completely hands-off of your child's education. It was a philosophy developed in the 70s. It definitely has a 70s movement style to it because it's all about freedom.

They believe that your child will self-learn and teach themselves whatever they need because it's driven by their own interests. And if they find a love for math, they're going to figure out a way to learn it because it will get them to where they want to be. So that's kind of the source of unschooling is rather than feeding your kids a bunch of information, let them discover it on their own. [00:34:26] And when you own that information yourself, you're going to do much more with it, which I do love a lot of the belief behind the philosophy.

So, anyways, my friend decides to unschool her daughter. Her daughter's extremely dyslexic so was never able to read up until she took her out of school. I think she took her out of school when she was in third grade. So she still was not reading in the third grade.

She took her in. She did not do any math. She did not do any reading, any subjects. She let her daughter just listen to audiobooks all throughout the day. She had her daughter help her with her Etsy store. They just kind of did life together. They gardened together. They hiked together. They made food together. There was no schooling going on with this child.

Well, the mom kind of decides that she's ready for her daughter to go back to school in the eighth grade. [00:35:26] So between the third grade and the eighth grade, this daughter had zero education. Okay. From what we would consider education, you know, the worksheets and the curriculum and everything like that.

I will say in those years... she's a close friend, so I was able to watch this daughter. This daughter started her own business on Etsy, taught herself multiple skills. Like she taught herself how to sew. She taught herself how to do all these amazing things.

Meanwhile, she's listening to like Pride and Prejudice. I think she even listened to Anna Karenina when she was 12 or something like that, all on audiobooks. Never really wrote that much. She figured out how to write because she started this Etsy business. She figured out math because of this Etsy business. There was no math curriculum.

So she sends her back to eighth grade and we're all, all the friends are just anticipating what is going to happen. [00:36:28] And she puts her in this very rigorous school and we're just like, "Oh, this poor girl is going to fail and it's going to make homeschooling look bad." That girl made straight A's the entire year. She thrived.

I feel like that's the biggest win ever because do you know what school is? It's systems. Our brains know how to detect systems very easily. And so as soon as you figure out the system that even math is a series of systems of algorithms of formulas, you know. As soon as you learn how to figure out systems, you can ace it. It's just whether or not you want to.

This girl with no, what we would call education reentered the world of education and made straight A's. I mean, she got better grades than the kids that had been there since kindergarten. I just think that's a true testimony of we are created to adapt so quickly to whatever environment that we're in. [00:37:36] For those people that think your kid is going to be behind or whatever, they might, but they'll catch up very quickly. It's just part of the human brain. So I wouldn't be too worried about it.

I talked earlier about formal grammar. We've never done formal grammar in our household. My kids don't know what an adjective is, but my son has been able to go through multiple English classes. I ran into one of his professors and I didn't know her, but she saw him and recognized him. And she came over to me and she said, "He has written a paper that I will never forget. I want to tell you that he's an amazing writer." And I just thought, Good thing I didn't waste my time on grammar and take that love of the written word away from him.

So I don't know. There's a lot to be said on this subject. But I would just say, let's reinvent what you think education is. And it truly is just about learning. [00:38:36] It's not about learning facts or information or systems or anything like that. It's just about learning and walking through life and learning new skills and a lot of problem-solving. And I feel like homeschooling has certainly allowed our kids to learn problem-solving a lot earlier on because mom's not there to provide this crazy system for them. They have to figure things out on their own.

Laura Dugger: Have you checked out our library of articles available at TheSavvySauce.com? New posts are added multiple times a month related to parenting, intimacy and marriage, personal development, habits, and other topics connected to what we discuss here on The Savvy Sauce. If you sign up to join our email list, you're also going to enjoy little extras delivered straight to your inbox.

Our hope is to encourage you to have your own practical chats for intentional living. So these freebies will include things like questions that you can ask on your next date night, safe resources to read to promote enjoyment in your intimacy and marriage, or questions to ask your kids to connect at a more relational level. [00:39:44] We hope you check out all the available reads at TheSavvySauce.com under the articles tab.

Jodi, before we pressed record, we were talking about how homeschooling and parenting really overlap. So do you have any other practical tips for parenting and homeschooling that you'd like to share?

Jodi Mockabee: Yeah. I mean, I would say if you can parent, you can homeschool. Homeschooling is just an extension of parenting. It is very relational. It requires habits. And so through habits, that's what we're teaching as parents.

And I would feel like if you want to encourage yourself or give yourself the tools to succeed with homeschooling, then I would focus on your parenting first. I have a friend who spent an entire year of homeschooling on character development. So she researched a bunch of different books that would really work on character for her own kids so that they would really be able to figure out how to choose the right decisions, how to respect mom. [00:40:49]

That year was not wasted. It set a foundation for the rest of her schooling journey because they worked so much on the character of their children during that year.

As far as parenting and homeschooling being interconnected, I would just encourage you to really focus on your parent-child relationship and understand that that's going to carry itself all the way through, that the relationship is going to be connected to the schooling experience for all of you.

I'll never forget, I was really frustrated — this is probably, I don't know, five years ago or something like that, maybe more — that my kids would... they would huff and puff if I asked them to do something like take the trash out or something like that. And I just kept thinking like, "Oh, these kids are so entitled. When are they going to get gritty?" Why can't they just work hard and put their chin down? They need more adversity. They need to live in the inner city and experience hard things." [00:41:50]

You know, I like went way far, and I'm sure every parent can relate, to the overthinking of my kids are doomed because we've created soft children or something like that. But in my quest for the answer of this, I searched books about creating grit in children basically. And I came across this book, How Children Succeed. And it totally changed my perspective on creating kids that are headed to success.

I thought for sure it would be adversity. I'm having them do hard things, pushing them, you know, all of that. And it came down to two things: attachment and accountability.

Children who have healthy attachment and healthy accountability, whether it's a parent or a mentor in their life go further. And there's these like studies that they have of these inner city kids in Chicago. They did this whole experiment where they brought mentors into their life and the amount of time that the mentors spent with them. [00:42:55]

So if the mentor was in their life for six months, their socioeconomic status would rise a little bit higher. If the mentor was in their life for a year, their status would rise even higher. They would go from, you know, minimum wage to the next level. And it showed how you can get these kids out of this oppressive system through accountability and attachment.

He also gives a lot of other examples, but I just thought that is mind-blowing. So this whole time we're thinking that we need to give them this and give them that. And really it comes down to the attachment and the accountability.

So to break it down from a parental perspective, it would be relationship and mentorship, you know, discipleship. How are you holding your children accountable when they're little looks more like consistency and discipline.

Now we're in these teenage years. It looks a lot like conversations and praying for natural consequences. [00:43:55] Having teens... I don't think it works out well when you have a bunch of rules and you discipline your teens. It just makes sneaky kids in my opinion.

By the time that they're teens, you want that relationship built so that it's all built on trust and conversation. And so you can talk about sex. You can talk about social media. You can talk about alcohol and drugs and all the things that they're being faced with or that they see their friends doing or any of that. And it's just an open conversation. And so you have that accountability there.

So the early years you work on all of that attachment so that then the accountability is very relational. I don't know if that makes sense, but I would say that's kind of how parenting and homeschooling is interconnected.

Laura Dugger: That's so good. Then even bringing it down to some themes also that you've spoken throughout this time together, just about reading and outdoor play. Is there anything practical you would want to leave us with on those two topics? [00:44:58]

Jodi Mockabee: Absolutely. I think creating your home environment is really important if you choose homeschooling. Even if you don't. I know some families that don't homeschool, but you would walk into their home and they have this like healthy learning environment. They have instruments out. They have baskets of books laying around, high-quality art supplies for their kids to dabble with. I call that strewing.

And so creating this environment where you can leave things out for your children to discover, to discover on their own versus you just, you know, feeding it to them, that connection is so important for them to find something out on their own and take joy and pleasure in it versus you telling them, "This is what it is. Now go use it." There's such a different mental process for a kid to explore something on their own.

I think creating a home environment where you allow your children to have access to these things, to art supplies, to books, to instruments, you never know what's going to take on a new interest for them. [00:46:06] So that would be kind of one part.

The play aspect is just, you want to leave a lot of margin for your children to play and discover. It depends on the age of your child, but in the earlier years, ours, I think our schedule for the day allowed for at least five hours of outdoor play.

So there would be some time after lunch where they got about two hours of outdoor play. And then sometime after notebooking where they would play. We chose during those years not to do any organized activities, no gymnastics, no sports, because we felt that play and time together would benefit them much more than all of these outside-of-the-home activities.

I don't know if that's a one-size-fits-all for all families, but I know it allowed our kids to really explore each other and in the environment and nature. And they just were able to use everything they learned in school. [00:47:06] I'm thinking of the book Island of the Blue Dolphins.

We had read that years and years ago. And I remember walking outside to see the kids, they had set up a camp and they had their pocket knives and they were whittling and they started a fire. We had this mud kitchen area with a fire ring that they were allowed to start campfires and cook food on. They made it all happen. I didn't have to create any of that for them. The book set up the scene and they went and made it their own.

But they wouldn't have had that if they had to go to a sports practice or to gymnastics or something like that. So that wide open time to just play and explore and discover is I think essential in the early years.

In the later years, this is where it gets a little trickier and you just spend a lot of time on your knees, praying for guidance for the Lord to just really help you figure out what's best for your kids developmentally as they become teenagers. [00:48:08]

For us, it shifted a lot of what our family did. So we started doing some sports for the boys to get that testosterone out to physically push themselves further to be a part of a team. And so it started looking different. But I took my son out to dinner last night, my oldest son, he's 17, and we just had the best time talking about... he started telling me some of the things that happened when I wasn't outside when they were little, you know, catching snakes, making bombs, like all these things that mom did not want to know about.

And it was the most delightful conversation, even though now we have probably more of a typical family involved in sports and doing these things. He's an avid rock climber. He is outside all the time. He chooses to go on hikes. If he can't get friends to go with him, he'll go by himself. He's just the most incredible kid who has such a thirst for adventure. [00:49:11] And I think that comes from the foundation of hours and hours of creative play where there was not a lot of activities that were on the calendar. So that's a long-winded answer, but hopefully somebody got something from that.

Laura Dugger: Absolutely. I think you're illustrating how play is that higher form of learning. One time you summarized it so well when you just said, "Exhausted children equal better-behaved children." And it sounds like that applies to many ages.

Jodi Mockabee: It does. We've even discovered, even as teenagers, idle time is... what do they say? Idle time is the devil's work. With teenagers, we have found that they have got to stay actively busy. Otherwise, you know, I have two kids with phones now, they'll just sit on the couch and be on their phone.

They need to be busy. They need to be working. They need to be hiking. They need to be involved in things. Keeping them busy and physically tired makes them sleep well at night. They're not up all night on phones or video games or whatever. [00:50:18] It all has a purpose. And starting young just sets you on the trajectory to making those choices and letting them see that when they're older.

One of my boys took on a second job because he just realized I have too much free time. Like, "I'm not getting as many hours as I wanted in this one job, so I'm going to take on another job because I don't want to sit around and be bored all day." So it's just fun to watch them figure that out on their own, that they need to be more active so that they sleep well and wake up and do the same thing the next day.

Laura Dugger: That's so fascinating to see that pattern, too, and that wisdom in leaving margin when they're younger to be active. And yet that turns into filling it wisely as they progress toward adulthood.

Jodi, as we start to wind down this conversation, for any parents who are just trying to decide after hearing all these options and they're looking into which school option is best for their family, will you just share a few more of your favorite reasons to recommend that they consider home educating their children? [00:51:26]

Jodi Mockabee: Absolutely. I think first and foremost, probably the time that you have with your children, that beyond academics, you have the ability to disciple your children from such an early age and do it throughout the years and put things into their heart that you wouldn't have the opportunity to do in the small window of time that you get when they're home from school.

The other would be the flexibility to go and learn and explore and be more hands-on in life. You can travel, you can hike, you can discover, you can do museums. Wherever you're living, you can take advantage of so much more because you have the freedom to do that.

We don't love large groups of people. We don't enjoy doing much in the summertime as far as camping or anything like that because there are so many people doing it. But homeschooling allows you, as soon as school starts, you have the museums to yourself, you have the camp spots to yourself, you have so much more peace because you can choose to be flexible with that. [00:52:33] The flexibility has been another one that I just wouldn't trade for the world.

Then the sibling relationships, that again comes down to time. And they're spending so much time together and they're building so many memories together. There is just something really special about learning alongside of each other.

I think about what that does when moms go to conferences together or something like that. Essentially, they're doing the same thing. They're learning alongside of one another. There's a bonding that happens when you're opening your mind to learning. Imagine what that does with your children as siblings. That's a lot of just special memories and bonding going on there. Definitely for the sibling relationships.

Then the last one I would say is just the content that you are able to share with your children. It is incredible how you can bring in morality and character into nearly every book that you read. [00:53:34] There are so many lessons to be learned through history and through other people's stories.

Learning together alongside one another and being able to highlight the good and the bad. That doesn't mean hiding them from tragedy or anything like that. We've studied some really hard topics in our family, but what a privilege for me to be the one that creates the narrative behind that story.

I don't want somebody else with their own bias or their own political or moral perspective, I don't want them telling my kids what to think about that. I want to open up the conversation, ask my kids what they think about it. What does the Bible say about it? What does the Lord think about that? Being able to cater the books that you read, your education to the highest moral ground, which would be the Bible, God's word, is by far probably the most important part of homeschooling. [00:54:34]

I hope that has given enough tools for people to, if they have it on their heart, I don't believe that everybody should homeschool, but if you have it on your heart, if the Holy Spirit is prompting you to do it, then just to encourage you that there are so many benefits to it.

Laura Dugger: Absolutely. You have shared so much goodness with us. Can you remind us where we can go after this chat to continue learning more from you?

Jodi Mockabee: Absolutely. I have my book, The Whole and Healthy Family. And that is not a homeschooling book. It's more about our story as parents in the early years. You can get that book if you'd kind of to learn a little bit about our habits and systems and just hear our family's story. You can go to my website, JodiMockabee.com.

I never intended to sell curriculum or anything, but through my Instagram page, which is just @JodiMockabee, I would get so many questions about how we did things or how to find those resources or what our schedule is, or all the homeschooling questions that I ended up just creating studies and these manuals. [00:55:47]

Even we put a lot of our scripture to song, and so I started recording us singing scripture for memorization, and we sell that on the site. It's all just because it's what we've done, and we just decided to allow other people to have the opportunity to take part in the same stuff and be able to benefit a little bit from that and continue on camping and skiing and doing all the things that we do as we share kind of our homeschooling world with other people. So that's on JodiMockabee.com. That will give you all kinds of resources to be able to set up a kind of holistic homeschool.

Laura Dugger: Wonderful. Again, we will link to all of this in the show notes for today's episode. Jodi, you're familiar that we are called The Savvy Sauce because savvy is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so as my final question for you today, what is your savvy sauce? [00:56:46]

Jodi Mockabee: Okay, so I feel like I, you know, biblically should say reading my Bible. But I hope that just goes without question, that time with the Lord is always a good thing to do and will put your mind in the right spot, and your heart in the right spot. But I would say as a family, our getting up in the morning and going on a run, that's probably our savvy sauce. It just shakes all the cobwebs out. It starts our day. Everyone is awake and alert and tired.

You mentioned it yourself, but tired kids are good kids. So it just starts the whole family off on the right foot so that then we can focus on the Word and learning and being together. Our countenance is just a little higher because of it.

Laura Dugger: Wow. Well, Jodi, I've read and enjoyed your book, and now I've had a blast getting to chat with you today. [00:57:47] You are so inspiring and just delightful to be with. So thank you for being my guest.

Jodi Mockabee: Thank you so much for having me, Laura. This was really fun, and hopefully, we can do it again.

Laura Dugger: One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners and God is perfect and holy, so He cannot be in the presence of sin. Therefore, we're separated from Him.

This means there's absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a savior. But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only Son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute.

This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. [00:58:49] That is good news. Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus.

We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us. Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.

So would you pray with me now? Heavenly, Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change their lives now for eternity. In Jesus name, we pray, amen. [00:59:49]

If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him, you get the opportunity to live your life for Him.

At this podcast, we are called Savvy for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you're ready to get started?

First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision my parents took me to Barnes and Noble to get the Quest NIV Bible and I love it. Start by reading the book of John.

Get connected locally, which basically means just tell someone who is part of the church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.

We want to celebrate with you too. So feel free to leave a comment for us if you made a decision for Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process. [01:00:49]

Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.

If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

Welcome to The Savvy Sauce

Practical chats for intentional living

A faith-based podcast and resources to help you grow closer to Jesus and others. Expect encouragement, surprises, and hope here. Each episode offers lively interviews with fascinating guests such as therapists, authors, non-profit founders, and business leaders.

They share their best practices and savvy tips we can replicate to make our daily life and relationships more enjoyable!